It Gets Better

"Sometimes good things fall apartso that better things can fall together"
-Marilyn Monroe 


At the beginning of the year i started off a entry about how much life sucks, and my opinion hasn't exactly changed, i still haven't been able to afford to go back to school, my family still isn't complete, in the way i want it to be, and there are a lot of things id wish on a star for....BUT nonetheless i'd say right now I feel better then I have in a while. Even though there are things I feel I need in my life, I also feel like its not rushed, before I always felt that I needed to do things in a rushed manner, but why? Take your time, take it slow, that especially goes for young girls, enjoy your childhood, take your time to grow up. And also don't feel that everything  will last forever, whatever sadness you feel it's all temporary, and it does get better.

-Marilyn Monroe

Healing

“Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.” 
― John Lennon

Just because life is a bitch doesn't mean I will never give up on it. I have not suffered the most in this world, I don't even deserve pity, not that I would like it. So I will push forward even if this hellish downpour decides to turn into a hurricane. I will make something of my self, and then once I have I'll help others move forward as well, because while I find life a bit meaningless there are some things I want out of it, I want to see my family as one again, I want to believe once again that not all men are pigs, I want my heart back, and I want to see my nieces and nephews grow strong and smart. I want to believe that this world isn't as horrible as my mind sets it to be, so if this is healing...then I'll give it my all.

I'm not dead, but maybe i'm close to it.

Life sucks. It's full of hardships and heartbreaks, and a bunch of idiots.
I guess maybe you can tell I've been through some shit eh? But eff it.
I've been so depressed lately, and not the "depressed" feeling you think your feeling, but the real shit.
Everything seems meaningless, literally EVERTHING, so i don't do shit.
And then I hate myself for that cause the world keeps spinning and I feel like I'm falling behind.
So what to do?


That I do not know.